How to Have Better Conversations About Hard Things

May 4, 2021

Guests: Anna Sale

Anna Sale is a journalist, host of WNYC's Death, Sex & Money, and author of Let's Talk About Hard Things. Her interviewing experience spans grief, intimacy, money, family, and identity.

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About this episode

Anna Sale explains why conversations about death, sex, money, family, and identity are so hard: the decline of institutional and ritual scaffolding leaves individuals responsible for navigating them alone. They discuss the skills of listening, asking open-ended questions, pacing, and accepting a lack of closure; how to support grieving people without trying to fix or explain death; and how to talk about sex as ongoing negotiation around consent, differing desires, and changing relationship models. Sale describes why money is difficult to discuss — inequality, shame, luck, and moralized ideas about success — and how family systems lock people into roles, so that sometimes preserving connection means validating feelings rather than correcting facts. They also discuss attending to power and individual experience in conversations about identity.

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